Houston Wedding News

Wedding Planners

Wedding Planner Shares Mistakes Guests Make — How to Fix Them

  • I am an expert marriage ceremony planner, and I’ve seen loads of dangerous visitor habits at occasions.
  • It’s your accountability to RSVP, present up on time, and preserve observe of your issues at a marriage.
  • Do not be impolite to the occasion distributors or make the day tougher for the couple in any means.

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In my 5 years as an expert marriage ceremony planner, I’ve realized one factor or two concerning the individuals who attend my occasions.

Learn on for the most typical errors I see marriage ceremony visitors make, and learn how to keep away from them.

Please do not wait till the final minute or neglect to RSVP

A marriage is not like a traditional social gathering the place you may see how you’re feeling within the morning and resolve accordingly.

The occasion typically includes catering, whether or not it is a yard potluck or a proper dinner, and whoever’s offering the meals should know the way many individuals to plan for.

Whenever you refuse to RSVP, you pressure the couple to trace down the knowledge after they’re already means too busy making an attempt to plan their marriage ceremony.

Do not act like the couple higher than they know themselves

Wedding planning can take its toll, however most individuals getting married nonetheless know their very own minds. They’re, in spite of everything, grownup people.

Consider them after they let you know what they do or don’t desire.

This push-and-pull typically comes up round registries. If the couple asks for money, donations to nonprofits, or non-physical items like reward playing cards or experiences, please do not inform them they’re unsuitable and purchase them a vase.

The perfect reward you may give as a visitor is respecting their needs.

Distributors are there to make the occasion run easily — do not make their job tougher by being impolite

buffet at a wedding

Caterers are attempting to get you fed in a well timed style.


Wedding distributors construct their companies on serving others, however that does not imply you must benefit from them.

Company typically neglect this, notably after a number of journeys to the bar, however do not make a idiot of your self by snapping your fingers on the caterer, telling the florist learn how to do their job, or cornering the marriage planner.

Deal with the distributors such as you would need to be handled should you had been working a bodily demanding, typically underpaid service job.

Communicate up should you’re nervous about attending the marriage for no matter purpose

In some conditions, marriage ceremony visitors want sure issues with the intention to really feel protected whereas celebrating the completely happy couple.

Company may have details about a venue’s accessibility, affirmation that the meals will not trigger an allergic response and/or violates a spiritual perception, house to breastfeed, particulars concerning the marriage ceremony’s COVID-19 security coverage, or assurance that they will not be in danger due to their race or sexual identification, to call a number of.

In a super world, the couple will proactively present this data, however marriage ceremony planning is definitely a 10-hour-a-week dedication, so some issues fall via the cracks.

For those who want one thing from the couple, please inform them with kindness, empathy, and spot as a lot as attainable. They need you to get pleasure from your self as a lot as attainable — it is why they invited you within the first place.

The couple did not hand-pick favors so that you can depart them on the desk

Wedding favors

Even when you do not need it, it is well mannered to take the favor.


I do know none of us want extra monogrammed knickknacks, however simply seize the darn coozie, OK?

You may toss it or, ideally, recycle it as quickly as you get house, however should you depart it on the marriage ceremony, you are simply giving the couple extra to wash up.

And a tip for {couples}: For those who give favors, attempt to make them one thing that will not find yourself in a landfill.

Earlier than you attain out to the couple with a query, learn what they despatched you

As a visitor, you have possible acquired no less than one piece of correspondence from the couple. Usually it is a save-the-date or an invitation, however typically it is a marriage ceremony web site, Fb group, BCC’d e mail, or very lengthy textual content thread.

Regardless of the medium, please do the studying.

These messages comprise very important details about the marriage — most critically, they’re going to element when the ceremony begins. Do not be the visitor who asks the couple for this data the night time earlier than the marriage, as almost all {couples} inform me no less than one individual did earlier than theirs.

You are in command of conserving observe of your private belongings at a marriage

wedding reception table

Your dinner seat is often a protected spot for belongings.

Alex Gukalov/Shutterstock

It by no means fails to amaze me what a marriage visitor will pass over for anybody to seize — purses, cell telephones, bank cards. I’ve seen all of it sprawled out on a desk because the visitor dances the night time away.

This recommendation is not to scare you into considering somebody’s going to steal your stuff. I’ve by no means had this occur within the greater than 50 weddings I’ve deliberate. A marriage vendor has much more to lose than a visitor in the event that they’re accused of theft (ie their total on-line repute and livelihood).

However please attempt to keep in mind the place you place your stuff. A very good place is in your seat. Tuck that seat beneath the desk or put one thing over the gadgets after which let unfastened.

It is a lot simpler to reclaim this stuff — or, as typically occurs, have a sober vendor provide help to reclaim them — if we are able to slim down the place you have been.

Do your self a favor and pack a snack so you aren’t getting hangry

This sounds foolish however significantly, throw a granola bar in your bag or stuff a number of fruit snacks within the glove compartment.

The most important grievance I hear from visitors is that they are hungry, and though I agree that the most effective events have loads of good meals, typically a pair actually cannot afford to provide the five-course meal of your goals.

Do not spend the day hangry — pack a number of backup snacks simply in case.

For those who’re shopping for a giant or heavy reward, simply mail it to the couple

gift table wedding

Large items generally is a nuisance.

Jayme Burrows/Shutterstock

I really like the assertion you are making an attempt to make with that enormous, 50-pound current. Present-giving is clearly the way you categorical love, and I am right here for it.

However what the heck is the couple imagined to do with that on the finish of the night time?

Please make it simple and have large items mailed to the couple instantly. For those who really feel odd coming empty-handed to a marriage, convey a card. Bonus factors should you use the cardboard to inform the couple what you despatched them.

In almost all conditions, something that is dropped at a marriage should be eliminated the identical day. Which means your love token simply turned the issue of whichever VIP visitor was tasked with clean-up.

Remember to think about journey and parking time earlier than the ceremony

It is a fable that weddings by no means begin on time.

They’ll run behind, after all, however typically there’s a lot programming after the ceremony that it is crucial the principle occasion begins as scheduled, so you do not run out of time and get kicked out of the venue.

A visitor’s function right here is to think about journey time and parking.

This data could also be readily accessible on the invitation. But when it isn’t, you’ve got Google. use it

Bear in mind, the marriage is not about you

wedding reception

The day is concerning the couple, not you.

Hiraman/Getty Pictures

The aim of a marriage is to not spend probably the most cash, put on the nicest garments, or eat the most effective meals.

The purpose of a marriage is to begin a wedding, so problem your self to middle the couple.

Ask your self in case your grievance helps the couple accomplish their purpose. If not, attempt to preserve it to your self.

Odds are you are not going to completely screw up the day, so cease performing bizarre

Company have requested me sufficient dumb questions in 5 years that I’ve began to marvel what makes type, clever individuals who appeared completely regular act so unusual throughout weddings.

In my skilled opinion, the bizarre habits is almost at all times the results of them considering they’ll mess up the marriage. And the extra they care concerning the individuals getting married, the weirder they get.

Contemplate this a pardon from an professional: You are not going to mess up the marriage until you go after the couple’s relationship. Not planning on doing that? Nice, have enjoyable.


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